Mama Pat

At our wedding rehearsal dinner

After a fast and furious battle with Alzheimer's, my sweet Mama Pat went home to be with her Lord on Saturday, May 3rd.

Papa Sam and Mama Pat

It's hard to express what my feelings are for her.  I never lived near my Mama Pat and Papa Sam, but I always felt so close to them.  I think because our visits were always few and far between, the time spent with them left an impact, a mark, on my life.  Not that the time I've spent with other family hasn't, but I think I always knew that I needed to take in every moment I could when they were around.  So I did. The beautiful, loving memories of baking in her kitchen, sitting at her sewing machine, listening to her ornery giggle, swinging on their porch swing, and watching her care for her ailing mother, and soon after her ailing husband.

Swinging with baby Nathan (about 5 months old)

Mama Pat was a servant.  She gave her life in service for those she loved.  After her own mother had a stroke, she cared for her in her own home for years, and when she could do it no longer, she spent hours upon hours with her in the nursing home.  After many years, Grandma Blanche passed away, and just a few years later, Mama Pat was caring for her husband while he battled a rare form of cancer.  When he passed away two years ago, I think he little body just needed a break.  She was a servant to others at the expense of herself.

Playing with Nate on the floor.  They always got down to be with the babies.

Mama Pat did something years ago that I will always appreciate and treasure.  She took time, lots and lots of time, to search deep into our family records and put together an amazing family tree.  A family tree that went back, at least as deep as the 1700s.  I am grateful for the legacy she left behind.

My mom, with her mom and dad

I wish I could have bottled her little laugh.  I always thought it was so ornery.  This sweet lady, with eyes that twinkled with enough mischief to know that she could possibly be "up to no good", but would fool those not expecting it.  I loved to hear her laugh.

This is what Mama Pat loved to do.  Coloring with her grandkids

She loved to cook and bake.  She spent hours with me in the kitchen, teaching me how to make home made noodles, using no recipe but silly measurements in your hand, and words no one uses anymore (What is Oleo anyway?  Well, if you ask her..."Oleo is Oleo, and butter is butter.")  She did things the good ole fashion way....at least until she realized she could fool most of us with ready made mashed potatoes and noodles.  Oh, but she loved to cook.  

Nicole with Papa Sam and Mama Pat

Mama Pat was one of the craftiest people I've ever met.  I think I inherited her desire...which is no good without her talent (which I don't have).  She has sewed quilts, crocheted quilts, hand made photo albums, taught pottery classes, and tried other crafty little crafts with seashells and other random items.  

Mama Pat and Nicole

Reading to Nicole

This sweet woman is finally at rest with her Lord, whom she loved.  She loved Jesus and could not wait to see him.  She was a hard worker, a fun lady, and great grandma.  I love her, and will miss her dearly.

With the news of her death, I quickly made plans to drive to Ohio.  I had to be at her funeral.  There was no way I could not go.  Thankfully, my dad was able to ride up with me and Jeremy flew up the night before the funeral.

Our last visit, she got to come to Tampa.  

To be honest, this was something I've never really experienced before.  This was a full out funeral service, and I was really scared.  Scared of what I would see, scared of what I would do (or not do), scared of what the kids would think or do....it was just a bit scary for me.  But, it didn't need to be.  It was beautiful, peaceful, and it was closure.

One of the displays at the funeral service

The funeral home had two sets of Calling Hours, or visitation.  The kids and I went for a little while.  I tried to prepare them ahead of time of what they could see, knowing that she would have an open casket.  They seemed much more at ease with it than I expected.  

Just last year with Hannah and Nicole

As we walked up to pay our respects, I reminded them that this body that they see, that it's not really Mama Pat.  This is just her shell.  Like the seashells we see at the beach.  It's a remnant of what once lived there, but it's not really her.  You see, She is with Jesus.  Yes, we are sad because we won't be able to see her again, hug her. listen to her laugh, or watch her cook...but we don't have to be overcome, because we know that she is with one who loves her more than any other.  It was beautiful.

The next day was the funeral.  Jeremy was asked to be a pall bearer (I gave him that news the night before).  Once again, this was all new.  While in the service, the funeral home puts flags on our cars to indicate the procession we would be part of.  After the service, we watched the men carry her to the hearse and then we followed behind, in a procession I won't soon forget.  She lived in this smallish town outside of Columbus.  Small enough, and country enough (because true country was just a couple miles away), that respect and honor are still in tact.  We were escorted by several police cars who blocked off the roadway to allow our group through.  Cars, and even a man on a lawn mower, would pull over and stop out of respect.  When our escort ended at the edge of town, the police gave a final solute.  I have never experienced anything like that.

The grave side service was short, the weather was beautiful, and the family was all there.  

I got to see the gravestone for the first time, a dual stone for my Papa Sam and my Mama Pat.  

Nicole made a rainbow loom heart and flower that she left on the tombstone.  

We went back to a church in Amanda and had a little reception with final stories, laughs, and chats with family and friends.  

DAD!  I wanted a picture of Cassidy and I!

Oh there, that's better.  My 'little' cousin Cassidy and I.

The whole few days leading up to the service were filled with fun and memories, just the way she would have wanted it.  The one thing missing was her (and Papa Sam of course).  It all felt normal, until reality set in that we would not be having a home cooked meal in their dinning room that night.  That was hard, and really sad. 

Getting a full service spa treatment when she came to visit.

I think what makes me the saddest is knowing that my children won't know this sweet woman the way that I did.  We had a nice visit with her the year before, and hopefully a few memories from that will remain.  But, it breaks my heart to know that they won't hear her giggle, look into those eyes, and feel the warmth of her hug.  

So it is with life...and with death.