The Sweet Times

I'm a pretty "tough" mom when it comes to bed times. Yes, I allow my children to "cry-it-out", especially when I know they can sleep on their own. But, as my mothering has matured, I've also learned that sometimes it's when you break your own rules that you are rewarded.

Nicole has never really been one for wanting to be held, rocked, back rubbed, hair massaged or tickled. Even when she was a newborn, I remember tickling my finger down her back and she would arch up and away as if to say "hands off" She is sort of like me. I pretty much don't want to be touched unless I do, then it's ok. Make sense? That's what I thought.

Anyway, Hannah is the total opposite. She melts in your arms and would like nothing more than to be held all night long, while your rocking her, singing to her, rubbing her back and playing with her hair. It has taken a lot of time to find the balance in "loving on" both of my kids. Nicole won't let you do it enough, Hannah will take all you got:-)

Hannah has been feeling sick lately, nothing major, just a yucky cough and stuffy nose. But, it is always during those times that I toss my ideas out the window and hold my babies as much as they'll let me. I guess I remember being comforted by my mom when I was sick growing up. Still to this day, I don't like to be sick alone, I want someone with me....not so they can see how crappy I feel, but to be tender and sweet with me. I guess it's the one time I don't mind being touched, of course, unless I don't want to be :-)

Well, this afternoon, Nicole went down for her nap like a champ...I mean not one peep from her (which has been odd lately, she must have been zonked!). Hannah however has been playing with her light switch non-stop. Finally I went in there and picked her up, and she clung to me as if to say, "please mommy, don't put me down". So, I listened. We sat in the glider chair and, awkwardly, held my little girl as she gripped my shoulders so as not to slide down my huge belly and laid her head on me. We rocked for some time, all the while, I had a perfect view of my little Nicole. Sleeping soundly and sweetly. I wanted to grab her up and hold her in my arms too...but I knew she wouldn't like that (and there's no way I can "hold" three at a time at this point). Hannah was content with just rocking for a time, then she looked up at me and started to hum....which was her cue to make me sing to her. I didn't because I didn't want to awaken precious Nicole, and Hannah understood.

I guess what I wanted to say was, I love my girls. They are sweet, precious, alike and different. I love to see how their personalities are the same and contrasting too. It's interesting how you have to learn to "love on" your children in different ways to suit what they like and what their needs are. I wonder what baby boy will want/like. Will he be independent and wiggly like Nicole, or will he be sweet and tender like Hannah? Will he be totally different and rough and tumble or will he be something I don't even know how to express? I guess time will tell, and until then...I'll continue to marvel at how my little ones are growing so quickly.