The Age of Innocence

There are several definitions of the word Innocence...I will point out two here:
1. Freedom from sin, moral wrong, or guilt through lack of knowledge of evil
2. lack of worldliness or sophistication; naivete

So often, when people see a baby or even a child they exclaim, "oh, he/she is so innocent".  I often wonder what they mean.  If they mean definition number 1, I think they are dead wrong, if they mean definition number 2....then, I agree.

Let me start with number 1....Innocence: freedom from sin, moral wrong, or guilt through lack of knowledge of evil.  I don't believe anyone is truly innocent by that definition, according to the Bible.  Even a child...even my sweet sweet baby boy, Nathan, harbors sin in his heart.  It is the curse of the fall.  Every man and woman is born seperated from God.  How are we separated?  Because we are unrighteous, we are sinners.  Psalm 51:5 Behold, I was brought froth in iniquity, and in sin my mother conceived me. Gen 8:21....for the intent of man's heart is evil from his youth... Pro. 22:15, Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child...Ecc. 7:20, Indeed, there is not a righteous man on earth who continually does good and who never sins....

My point is that no one is innocent, not even my sweet babes.  So, no....my little guy or girls are not innocent in the sense of "sinless".

BUT....I hope they are innocent in the sense of the other definition....lack of wordiness or sophistication.  I know I've only been a mother for four year, but the longer I am a mom, the more I think it is OK to keep as much of the world away from your young children as possible.  Recently, we have acquired a TV signal in our house.  Yeah, it's been nice (we got to watch all of the basketball finals which Jeremy enjoyed), but it comes with downfalls too.  We try to carefully guard what our children see and hear.  And, quite honestly, TV is an area that they can potentially see and hear a lot.  There are about 4 TV shows I let them watch, and even those I listen to and turn off if they are talking about something I don't want my kids to ponder upon.  Because, just as the Bible reminds me us that we are all sinners, it also reminds us that what we allow in our minds and lives is extremely important in learning to follow Christ.  Proverbs 4:23-27 Whach over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life.  Put away from you a deceitful mouth and put devious speech far from you.  Let your eyes look directly ahead and let your gaze be fixed straight in front of you.  Watch the path of your feet and all your ways will be established.  Do not turn to the right nor to the left.  Turn your foot from evil.  earlier in chapter 4 vs 14-15, Do not enter the path of the wicked and do not proceed in the way of evil men.  Avoid it, do not pass by it; turn away from it and pass on.

My job, as a mother (and Jeremy's as a father) is to train our children in the way they should go.  This means right now, especially right now, we choose what we allow our children to see, hear, know.  And, as far as I'm concerned, I believe my job...especially with the girls, is to protect them from worldliness.  They will be exposed, much sooner than I hope them to....but they will, I know that.  But, my goal is that when they are, they will have a strong foundation of God's word and that their little minds will be able to discern between right and wrong, good and evil, from a Biblical perspective, not a worldly perspective.  I want to teach them that it's ok to be different from others, different from what our culture says is "cool" or "ok".

Nancy Leigh DeMoss says, " The Truth is, our task is not to rear children who can "fit in" or merely "survive" in this world.  The challenge of every Christian parent is to bring up children who love God with all their hearts, souls, minds, and strength; who have a vibrant, personal relationship with the Lord Jesus; and whose lives  will be bright and shining lights, penetrating the darkness around them.  Christian parents ought to be seeking to raise up not just "good" children, but children who enthusiastically embrace the Truth, children who love righteousness and hate evil, children who will be used by God to change this world."

Even more strikingly she says, "Children will cultivate an appetite for whatever they are fed in their earliest, formative years."  I think of this almost every time I turn on Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.  It's one of the few they watch, but I have turned an episode or two off, because I didn't like what they were talking about.  It is so important for us to teach our children to be transformed by Christ and not conformed to this world.

Two things have made me think about this recently.  The first is positive.  Nicole received quite a bit of money from grandparents and great-grandparents this year for her birthday....almost $30 total!  After we put a portion of it into her missionary bank, she had $25 left.  I told her we would go to Target and asked what she wanted to buy herself.  She thought a moment and said, "a cookie"  I replied that was fine, we could buy a cookie, but what toy did she want.  She thought again and said, "I just want to buy a cookie.  Do I have enough money for a cookie?"  Many, many four year old would have a running list in their heads of the coolest, newest toys that they want.  I loved that Nicole had no idea what was popular (in part to the limited tv time I think).  I was so thankful that she had not become worldly and materialistic. 

The flip side happened today.  After they finished watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Nicole came out and said, "Mommy, have you ever heard of Hannah Montanna?" I slowly looked at her and said, Yes-have you?  She told me that she saw her on Mickey Mouse (one of the Disney channel commercials).  Honestly....I was saddened by it.  I told her that Hannah Montanna is a TV show for girls a lot older than her, like 12 or 14.  Now, I don't think I have anything against Hannah Montanna, I've never watched one all the way through.  But, I certainly don't want my 4 year old daughter watching her.  She doesn't need to see a "tween" smart talking to her parents or gossiping about friends.  For now, she needs to be encouraged to obey her parents and talking lovingly about others.  Now that she knows about Hannah Montanna, she'll certainly see all of her stuff out there and this will be something we'll have to talk about a lot. 

To be really honest, my kids see enough selfishness and negativity from me all day, they don't need to see it and let it be reinforced by strangers, actors no less.  They see the world, but hopefully they also see me working through my sins, confessing them (sometimes to them) and hopefully growing each day. 

My children are like tiny little tender plants.  I am nurturing and growing them.  Providing a good environment for them to grow strong and tall so that "when their roots have developed and they are strong enough to withstand adversity, they can be transplanted outdoors."

My decisions about our children are not to say a certain show or program or music or book or video or whatever is bad for you or for me, but I don't think it would cause to strengthen my children now Before their roots are firm.  I may not always make the right decisions...and I feel like I err more on the side of trying to conform or not hurt feelings rather than stand up for my children, but I am working on always basing my decisions on what I think is best to train them in the way they should go. I only have a few years with them, and every morning I wake up feeling the burden of one less day to teach them and train them.  I don't want to blow it, because I can't have this time back.